Most of the time when we talk about low libido or low sex drive, we usually think of women who lost their interest in sex. But the fact is that many man experience periods of reduced sex drive. Variety of reasons could cause low interest in sex, for examples, unhealthy relationship, job stress, financial pressure, anxiety, depression and other mental health issues. Also, certain illnesses, medication or drugs negatively affect sexual desire.

If the sexual issue is not addressed early, the problem can be compounded while creating a vicious cycle. For example, depression can lead to low sex drive, which worsen depression, which leads to unhealthy eating choices and avoiding exercise. This in turn decreases sexual drive even further, which make the situation spiral down.

As mentioned, both man and women face such problems and more so in today’s increased pressure. This is why communication between couples is the foundation for healthy relationship. Mutually open and supportive environment is key to successful relationship. It enables individuals to express their issue in a safe and healthy atmosphere, allowing them to express their concerns, feelings and needs and clarify to expectations.

When facing with a sexual desire issue, it is important to see a doctor to determine if the cause of the low sexual drive is due to physical factor or psychological factor. In case of psychological reasons, it would be wise to involve a professional, such psychotherapist, couples counselor or sex therapist. In some cases, it would be even a necessity. A therapist can help illuminate some problems that may be hidden in the unconscious and provide alternatives to resolve them.

There are many marriages where a couple may have tried everything they can think of in order to make things work, while others feel that there is nothing that they can possibly do to improve their relationship. Regardless of what those involved in a “bad” marriage believe, there is no possible way that the marriage will survive if neither party involved are willing to put the effort to make it work.

Many people get married without talking about the important subjects involved in marriage. Despite efforts to encourage engaged couples into per-marital counseling, many believe they have a healthy enough relationship already only to find themselves comes to couples counseling only during crisis. Many do not realize that people continue to change, while situations or circumstances change too and this can put immense stress on a relationship. Life, surprisingly to many, can also be quite unpredictable and uncertain. As life changes, individuals change as well, which can either mean that a couples continue to grow together or continue to grow apart.

Many, married couples may eventually find that they may have reached a point in their marriage where they feel it is time to separate, or get some help. Couples counseling or marriage therapy could be more than a valid path to help couples in their relationship. Couples therapist help couples determine the issues that might be causing some difficulties in the relationship, and then work with them to improve their relationship. The marriage therapist guides the couple about their marriage, teach them the necessary skills and help them find the best solution and right path for them. Couples counseling is by no means a “quick fix;” it will take some dedication and commitment by both spouses in order for it to work.

It is very possible that a troubled marriage can be saved through couples counseling. Most couples who are willing to work on their relationship, make the effort and are committed to the process see positive results. There are situations where it might be best that a couple separate, but there are also many more marriages that can be saved. A couple will never truly know until they give it an honest effort.

A recent survey titled “2010 Sleep in America”  that was conducted by the National Sleep Foundation found that as many as 26 percent of couples report one or both partners are frequently too tired to have sex. Other studies have shown that many married couples have sex only one to three times per month.  People are busy. Somehow we manage to get through the day even though we are stretched for time, overworked and tired. Few of the main reasons that are associated with such low frequency of sexual engagement are life pressure, raising kids, demanding work or unemployment stress. All that and other reasons are energy consuming and tremendously affect the sexual intimacy of married and unmarried couples.

Exhaustion is very real and a big concern for couples. It is not surprising then that being tired is getting in the way of people having good sex on a regular basis. However, not often, it is not being tired that is preventing you from wanting sex. “We’re just too tired” is sometimes used to cover for other things that have gone wrong in the relationship or the bedroom: lack of communication, build up of resentment, boring sex, trust and jealousy etc. It is easier for a couple to avoid a huge argument by not opening a Pandora ’s Box. Agreeing that they are too tired becomes an easy salve on a big wound; however after only a short while this excuse stops working. In fact, many men and women have confessed that saying, “I’m too tired” has become a negative habit. They say it before they really think about whether they are tired or not.

The fact is that many couples have great sex lives regardless if they exhausted or not because they have healthy, intimacy relationship. In fact, some have more sex when they are tired because it is their way of relaxing and feeling good. Having sex can flood the brain with wonderful, endorphins, oxytocin and so on.

If you’re dealing more with the daily grind of life, scheduling sex is the easiest way for a couple to keep their sex life on the radar. It may not seem romantic and a couple usually feels like failures because they can no longer have spontaneous sex, however, chances are if they don’t schedule sex it’s not going to happen. They also need to wrap their heads around creating more realistic expectations on what is doable for their present lifestyle and schedule.

So the next time, when the words, “I’m too tired” as they relate to sex is still in your mind, think about how they are affecting your sex life overall. If you truly are too tired all the time, then maybe it’s time to get some balance in your life. After all, we can only hold our partner at arm’s length for so long before the relationship starts to suffer.