In psychology, self-esteem reflects a person’s overall evaluation or appraisal of her or his own worth. Self-esteem encompasses beliefs (for example, "I am competent/incompetent") and emotions (for example, triumph/despair, pride/shame). Behavior may reflect self-esteem (for example, assertiveness/passivity, confidence/caution).

Self-esteem is all about how much we feel valued, loved, accepted, and thought well of by others - and how much we value, love, and accept ourselves. People with healthy self-esteem are able to feel good about themselves, appreciate their own worth, and take pride in their abilities, skills, and accomplishments. People with low self-esteem may feel as if no one will like them or accept them or that they can't do well in anything.

We all experience problems with self-esteem at certain times in our lives - especially during our teens when we're figuring out who we are and where we fit in the world. The good news is that, because everyone's self-image changes over time, self-esteem is not fixed for life. So if you feel that your self-esteem isn't all it could be, you can improve it.

Synonyms or near-synonyms of self-esteem include: self-worth, self-regard, self-respect, self-love (which can express overtones of self-promotion), self-integrity. Self-esteem is distinct from self-confidence, which involve beliefs about ability and future performance.

The main cause of self esteem is our experiences that have occurred earlier in our lives. The development of low self–esteem takes time. It takes a series of events and a chain of habitual behaviors to dampen the sense of personal worth. So, if these experiences happened long ago, why is it that we still see ourselves in a negative light today? After all, haven’t we had adult experiences that are quite different from the ones we had as children? Yet, we might still hear, in our minds, what our parents or other people had said to us years and years ago. We might hear ourselves saying things like "This is not good enough," "You could have done better," "You are so stupid." These negative core beliefs are thoughts that are usually deep rooted, firmly held, and strongly ingrained in our minds. They are evaluations of ourselves and our worth or value as a person. These beliefs say, "This is the kind of person I am."

Parents, teachers, and other authority figures influence the ideas we develop about ourselves - particularly when we are kids. If parents spend more time criticizing than praising a child, it can be harder for a kid to develop good self-esteem. Because teens are still forming their own values and beliefs, it's easy to build self-image around what a parent, coach, or other person says.

Obviously, self-esteem can be damaged when someone whose acceptance is important (like a parent or teacher) constantly puts you down. But criticism doesn't have to come from other people. Some individuals also have an "inner critic," a voice inside that seems to find fault with everything they do. Also, people sometimes unintentionally model their inner voice after a critical parent or someone else whose opinion is important to them.

The key qualities contributing to positive self-esteem appear to be approval and acceptance. The following are some negative experiences that might contribute to low self-esteem:

• Punishment, neglect, or abuse
• Difficulty in meeting parents’ standards
• Not fitting in at home or at school
• Difficulty in meeting peer group standards
• Being on the receiving end of other people’s stress or distress
• Family conflict and breakdown
• Your family’s place in society
• An absence of positives

Finally, close and loving relationships with others later in life do contribute positively to self-esteem. It is challenging to form and sustain successful relationships when self esteem is low, but with gradual change of thoughts and habits, along with supportive environment and guidance, individual can develop a healthy and happy relationships.

Nathaniel Branden, a well known psychiatrist, came out with the following six pillars of self esteem:

• Living Consciously
• Self-Acceptance
• Self-Responsibility
• Self-Assertiveness
• Living Purposefully
• Personal Integrity

There are many known ways to improve one's self-esteem. To boost one's confidence, it may be helpful to practice the following self-improvement techniques and strategies:

• Refuting the inner critic that keeps on sending self-defeating messages;
• Practicing the art of self nurturing; and
• Getting much-needed help and support from people who are close to you.

The first and the most important step to increase self esteem is to tell the inner voice to shut up. The inner voice might say negatively about you. In such a situation you must praise yourself. Rebutting the inner voice that keeps on criticizing you should be done on a regular basis. However this step is not enough to develop self-esteem. The second step that one must initiate on a way to a healthy self-esteem is that a person should nurture himself. The most important part of this step is start treating yourself as a person who is worth while. In addition, seek out people who make you feel good. Remember that you get to choose your friends so why not choose people who think you're great?

If you want to improve your self-esteem, here are some steps to start empowering yourself:

• Try to stop thinking negative thoughts about yourself. If you're used to focusing on your shortcomings, start thinking about positive aspects of yourself that outweigh them. When you catch yourself being too critical, counter it by saying something positive about yourself. Each day, write down three things about yourself that make you happy.
• Aim for accomplishments rather than perfection. Some people become paralyzed by perfection. Instead of holding yourself back with thoughts like, "I won't audition for the play until I lose 10 pounds," think about what you're good at and what you enjoy, and go for it.
• View mistakes as learning opportunities. Accept that you will make mistakes because everyone does. Mistakes are part of learning. Remind yourself that a person's talents are constantly developing, and everyone excels at different things — it's what makes people interesting.
• Try new things. Experiment with different activities that will help you get in touch with your talents. Then take pride in new skills you develop.
• Recognize what you can change and what you can't. If you realize that you're unhappy with something about yourself that you can change, then start today. If it's something you can't change (like your height), then start to work toward loving yourself the way you are.
• Set goals. Think about what you'd like to accomplish, then make a plan for how to do it. Stick with your plan and keep track of your progress.
• Take pride in your opinions and ideas. Don't be afraid to voice them.
• Make a contribution. Tutor a classmate who's having trouble, help clean up your neighborhood, participate in a walk-a-thon for a good cause, or volunteer your time in some other way. Feeling like you're making a difference and that your help is valued can do wonders to improve self-esteem.
• Exercise! You'll relieve stress, and be healthier and happier.
• Have fun. Ever found yourself thinking stuff like "I'd have more friends if I were thinner"? Enjoy spending time with the people you care about and doing the things you love. Relax and have a good time - and avoid putting your life on hold.

It's never too late to build healthy, positive self-esteem. In some cases where the emotional hurt is deep or long lasting, it can take the help of a mental health professional, like a counselor or therapist. These experts can act as a guide, helping people learn to love themselves and realize what's unique and special about them.

Self-esteem plays a role in almost everything you do. People with high self-esteem do better in school and find it easier to make friends. They tend to have better relationships with peers and adults, feel happier, find it easier to deal with mistakes, disappointments, and failures, and are more likely to stick with something until they succeed. It takes some work, but it's a skill you'll have for life.

Both Individual and Group Counseling can help improve self-esteem. Such therapy might include assertiveness training, communication skills, and learning to recognize and understand own emotional responses in relation to others. Therapy may also explore early and later experiences that contributed to your low self-esteem. Group Therapy is particularly effective that it helps to foster trust and build relationships, and encourages a sense of belonging-components that are important for building self esteem. spiral2grow of New York provides individual and group counseling that assist people getting their life under self–control and to feel more productive and successful.

To gain more knowledge on self esteem and confidence, individuals may use search engines on the Internet such as Google or Yahoo. Our research has shown that the following search phrases are used by many when looking for issues of self-esteem: Low Self Esteem Help, Help Self Confidence, self esteem, building self-esteem, low self-esteem, high self-esteem, building self esteem, build self esteem, self confidence, self esteem NYC, self esteem New York, self worth, building self confidence, build self confidence, self esteem group, self confidence group, group New York, group NY, Group Therapy.

• http://www.more-selfesteem.com – articles, books and information about self-esteem
• http://www.self-esteem-nase.org - The National Association for Self-Esteem (NASE) purpose is to fully integrate self-esteem into the fabric of American society so that every individual experiences personal worth and happiness.
• http://www.selfesteemawareness.com  - Practical information for Building self esteem and confidence with awareness
• The Six Pillars of Self-Esteem - a great book by Nathaniel Branden