Assertiveness is a communication style. It is the ability to express your feelings, thoughts, beliefs, and opinions in a direct, respectful and open manner that doesn’t violate the rights of others.
If we do express ourselves openly and conceal our thoughts and feelings this can make us feel tense, stressed, anxious or resentful. It possibly would lead to unhealthy and uncomfortable relationships as we don’t feel safe and loves while not allowing people closest to us to really know us.
The main effect of not being assertive is that it leads to low self esteem. If we communicate in a passive manner we are not saying what we really feel or think. This means we can end up agreeing with and fulfilling other people’s needs or wants rather than our own. Lack of expression of needs might leads to depression. This can result in a lack of purpose, and a feeling of not being in control of our own lives.
Lack of assertiveness is also very common in social phobia. People with social anxiety tend to think that other people are being judgmental and critical about them and will avoid social situations because of this.
Being assertive involves first of all choosing to communicate – being active rather than passive – and then doing so in a manner that’s both respectful and honest. Becoming more assertive is rewarding as it increases your self-esteem and social ability and allows you to have more fulfilling life.
Please visit author, Moshe Ratson at his Google+ Profile:+Moshe Ratson