For an appointment:
Call  917-692-3867
For an appointment : Call  917-692-3867
5 Signs you need to Change How You communicate
Posted by:   |  Feb 04, 2017

Life is about socializing, interacting and communicating. You cannot live life happily without engaging with people and mingle with them. Besides, successful relationship requires effective communication skills.

Unfortunately, communicating effectively  doesn’t come naturally to most people. Many people  struggle to get their viewpoints across  because they don’t have the necessary skills or are unable to communicate well. If you need improvement in communication, how do you know that? Here is a look at the five not so subtle signs that outline the need for you to change the way you communicate with other people.

You get angry response

When you are getting your point across, do you feel that the person on the receiving end is firing back at you with angry reaction? While an angry response may be because of what you said, it may also be about the way you conveyed your message. Anger response is an indication that you triggered something within the other person and that your message didn’t land well.

Anger can typically stem from irritation, frustration or defensiveness. If you are unable to make  your clear that might be as a result of aggressive or angry way of communication, which trigger the recipient to act angry back. So, if you are getting angry responses, it is time you changed the way you communicate.

You have not said what you wanted

How many times do we come back from a conversation regretting things that we could have said or should have said, but were inadvertently unable to say? When it happens often, this highlights a problem in assertive communication.

The word communication means exchanging information or getting your ideas or viewpoints across from your mind to someone else’s. If you are unable to do so, there is no benefit of communicating with people. Similarly, if at the end of a conversation you still feel you were unable to say what you wanted, you need to reconsider your communication ability.

You blame and don’t take responsibility

When you talk to people, you are actually trying to achieve something positive out of it. Almost all conversations and communications serves to discuss issues, solve problems, remove disagreements, clarify things, make sure you help someone in need, etc. Communication is a two-way task. You must make a sincere effort to  listen to what others have to say, even if you don’t think their opinion matters.

The problem with this is that people will not want to communicate with a person who does not value their opinion. Often in conversations, one can start to blame people and not take responsibility on their own. This is not good communication method; communication  is about responsibly listening and understanding.  If you don’t act that way or blame others, you need to re-evaluate the way you communicate.

You are not being direct and sincere

People  can easily indentify a sincere conversation from one that is fabricated and made up. For a conversation to flourish, it needs to hit the reason and purpose the conversation was initiated. You cannot beat about the bush, be chaotic and unclear and hope that you will be understood. Accordingly, you should aspire to  lay in the groundwork when communicating as well as be direct and sincere.

You don’t feel at peace with yourself

One of the best ways to allay any fears, troubles, and problems that one may have with their life is to talk about them with friends and family or supportive individuals. Sharing your problems, talking about your uneasiness is a a  way to feel at peace with yourself. If you are unable to communicate comfortably with people, if you are unable to present your problem in an understandable light and if you are feeling guilty about something you wanted to say,  you will find it hard to gain peace of mind.  The only way then is for you to adjust the way you communicate openly and honestly, so you will find inner peace and success in relationships and life.



Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist (LMFT) in New York City
License # : 000697