For an appointment:
Call  917-692-3867
For an appointment : Call  917-692-3867

Psychological Boundary

Boundary is you first line of defense against stress. Developing solid boundary is one of the main factors to healthy well-being. Personal boundary marks the limits of what is within your control and what is beyond your control. This is your psychological space that separates you and others. If you build healthy boundary, you are clear about our value, opinion and needs and also respect others. You also promote positive energy within you and within your environment. On the other hand, if you do not have healthy boundary, you waste emotional energy on those things that are outside of your control and create your own misery and suffering.

Setting clear personal boundaries is the crucial to guarantee relationships are mutually respectful, supportive and caring. Self esteem is manifested in your level of assertiveness and the way you establish your boundaries. As such, psychological boundary is a measure of self-esteem and defines the quality of your life.

spiral2grow psychotherapist in NYC that offers tools for building self esteem and healthy boundary. Our psychotherapists and counselors in nyc specialize in boundary training that is key for building self esteem and confidence. We recognize the importance of setting healthy boundary in any relationships and see it as a key element in having a happy and fulfilling life. spiral2grow, located in midtown Manhattan at 260 Madison Avenue #8023, New York, NY 10016, employs proven treatment and counseling to enhance solid boundary as part of self esteem counseling in a variety of formats: individual boundary therapy and training, self esteem group and workshop.

  • Understanding Psychological and Personal Boundaries
    • Healthy boundary is key to successful relationship. Boundaries, in the physical world, separate one thing from another, like walls that separate the inside of a building from its outside. While psychological boundaries have no physical substance, they act very much like walls or dividers, that separate the mental private parts of people from the public parts.
    • Healthy individual boundaries have to do with self-determination, self-respect as well as respect to others. When these boundaries are intact, the individuals feel respected and safety is established. However, when they are broken, disrespect take place and wellbeing is at risk.
    • Mental health professionals stress that good boundaries are crucial to psychological health and well being. A boundary is a limit that promotes integrity and healthy relationships. Personal boundaries or psychological boundaries are the “territory” in which individuals outline their psychological and mental control. Similar to a country that has borders, custom and immigration; psychological boundaries define what is within your control versus what is not in your control, as well as the mechanism you enforce to establish you sovereignty (within your borders). It is a set of guidelines in which you allow “healthy” trade, goods and visitors to get into your psychological domain and what you are not allow to enter.One would expect that you would allow “visitors” enter your territory if it is healthy and beneficial, while preventing what could be dangerous or harmful.
    • In reality, the quality of our psychological well being, psychological strength and self esteem defines the quality of our boundaries and ultimately the quality of our relationships and life.Our personal boundary defines our identity and individuality and separate us from others. Our emotional boundary must be preserved because it is vital to our positive self identity and self-esteem. We must be able to differentiate our thoughts and feelings from those of others. These psychological borders in include physical, mental, psychological and spiritual boundaries, and involve beliefs, emotions, intuitions and self-esteem. It also includes guidelines, rules and limits that we establish for ourselves that we consider reasonable, safe and permissible ways for others to behave toward us, as well as how we conduct ourselves toward others, especially when they step outside those limits.
    • The Serenity prayer by Reinhold Niebuhr “…grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change; courage to change the things I can; and wisdom to know the difference…..” describes the ideal position in regards to personal boundary. Unfortunately, many people in actuality are performing the Serenity prayer backward, that is, trying to change the external things over which they had no control (mostly other people and life events), and taking no responsibility for their own internal process, over which they can have some level of control. Having some control or influence can be constructive and positive. However, trying to control something or somebody over one has no control is destructive and dysfunctional.
  • The Importance and Benefits of Healthy Boundaries
    • Clearly define ourselves and our individuality
    • Empower us to determine how we will be treated by others
    • Establish personal safety and promote personal nurturing
    • Create set or guidelines in which we conduct ourselves
    • Gain trust in ourselves to take care of our well being
    • Promote personal integrity and accountability
    • Build self esteem, confidence and leadership
    • The result of healthy boundaries is to preserve psychological durability and advance relationships, while having healthy sense of control and acceptance and overall well-being.
    • When you are in a relationship, you must allow individual identity and accomplish to develop and flourish. Healthy boundary promotes a balance of independence and interdependence; individuality and intimacy. Boundary in relationship to be constructive moves away from right and wrong, you and me etc.. Boundary’s highest form is form of maturity which is the unity and sum of everyone opinions (including all parts and differences). The other possibility respect and at times is “agree to disagree.”
Psychotherapy Services and Solutions
Resources
  • http://www.more-selfesteem.com – articles, books and information about self-esteem
  • http://www.self-esteem-nase.org - The National Association for Self-Esteem (NASE) purpose is to fully integrate self-esteem into the fabric of American society so that every individual experiences personal worth and happiness.
  • http://www.selfesteemawareness.com  - Practical information for Building self esteem and confidence with awareness
  • The Six Pillars of Self-Esteem - a great book by Nathaniel Branden
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Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist (LMFT) in New York City
License # : 000697