When you have intimate partner, you expect a partner who you support emotionally to support you in the same manner. Unfortunately, if one of the individuals has ADD, the non-ADD partner sometimes has to overcompensate to do their partner’s part, as well as their own. That situation introduces a great source of stress and frequently the non-ADHD spouses begin to feel angry, overwhelmed and resentful while s/he becomes critical and accusatory. Frustrations and tempers become more common and the relationship starts to deteriorate.
Therefore, it is very important for the non-ADHD spouse to develop an understanding of the impact ADHD can have on an individual’s daily functioning as well as the relationship. Adult ADD symptoms include inattention, distractibility, longer time to get things done, time management challenges, organization, forgetfulness and procrastination. These symptoms are chronic since childhood and persist into adulthood. These symptoms also tend to worsen as an individual’s environment becomes more stressed and as demands in life increase.
Most often the problematic behaviors of the ADHD partner are a function of an inability and impairment rather than a motivation issue. Yet, if the ADHD spouse is receptive to diagnosis and treatment, functionality typically improves fairly dramatically. Hopefully, with this knowledge, understanding and empathy the non-ADHD spouse is often less frustrated.
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